his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
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What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
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