I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
