Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
