ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
My feet surprised me
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
