It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
