farters have to be the big spoon...
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
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