she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
