I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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