yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Randomize
