Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
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