so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Randomize
