out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Randomize
