why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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