I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
We're not piercing ourselves today.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
