I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
