even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Bring me that man meat
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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