ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize
