What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Randomize
