is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
Randomize
