i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
