thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
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