i would punch a child for taco bell
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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