ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Randomize
