yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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