I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
