I'll bet she douches with gravy.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
