yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
21 People Reveal The Most Embarrassing Secrets They Know About Someone
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.