Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
