Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Randomize
