the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
