did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
jump out the window naked night went bad
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
