Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
