My underwear smells like fireworks.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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