i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Randomize
