I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
