absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I could have mohawked her pubes.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
Randomize
