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• (618): View more from Illinois

  so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.

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• (713): View more from Texas

  counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.

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  21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.

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• (504): View more from Louisiana

  seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.

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• (925): View more from California

  Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being

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• (661): View more from California

  How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.

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  19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”

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• (904): View more from Florida

  Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten

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• (805): View more from California

  Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.

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• (774): View more from Massachusetts

  I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.

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• (727): View more from Florida

  I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.

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• (718): View more from New York

  He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.

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