Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
