At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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