i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
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