You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
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