the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Randomize
