O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
