honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
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