He is an equal opportunity slut.
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize
