Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Little spoons don't ask big questions
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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