like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
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