It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Randomize
