My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
