He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
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